What’s the meaning in this mess?

Posted on 24. Mar, 2011 by in Life Coaching

I so want to avoid the question, “What’s the meaning in this mess?” and really haven’t been in the mood to look at the past few weeks in a state of reflective appraisal. The plumber who’s been working at our house continues to say, “buy a lotto ticket” and I wonder if the simple act of doing so might just change our current state, to one of luck and fortune? In this moment now, as I write this post, I realize the meaning in all this mess: is to act in a state of faith and abundance even when it’s raining and the skies aren’t so blue!

The reality of life is harsh, no bones about it, but I still carry a state of optimism despite the occasional rant and emotional flare up.  I’m considering this thought: what action am I taking now to better my situation or even accept it? In fact, I’ve already accepted what is, given many of the events in the past few weeks have been out of my control, however, I often haven’t been able to focus and take action on the things that enable me to feel progressive and energized. I have to cut some slack given it’s been a full time job “project managing” the numerous contractors and workers in and out of my home, and in the midst of it all, tending to the needs of family life.

I’m so grateful in many ways for the reassurance and humour each and every person has brought to our situation. There is one thing though, that is standing out, that I feel needs to be voiced: that women who run businesses out of their homes and look after a family can get royally screwed! Yup I said it, and I’m saying so because I’m not getting paid to do this work and it is work. It’s valuable work; raising children, managing a household, while still contributing to the economy through service or volunteerism.

I’ll be honest, there has been many mornings in this past month that I’ve wanted to walk out of the house and be embraced by an organization that pays me to show up and do good work! And yet, I can’t very well leave given the  unplanned “project” and tending to the needs of my young children. So another possible meaning: can’t have it all, at the same time! I remember telling a few ambitious and stressed women some time ago that as women, there is no such thing as “balance” it’s just a matter of understanding, we can have what we want, it just might not happen at the time we want or, all at the same time.

Naturally, I want a steady flow of meaningful & challenging work to pay the bills but it’s hard to focus on business when there’s been what feels like a zillion interruptions and set-backs. But, isn’t this just another reminder that there’s a time for everything and if I had all the amazing work in the world I might not be able to give it my best?

Joan of ArcI’m conveying a couple of converging thoughts and certainly don’t have all the answers but on a larger scale, I’m thinking about the status of working women in the world (and I don’t necessarily mean,”paid” working women, as once again that would diminish the many contributions women make to keep our homes and communities functioning without financial compensation).  This larger concern requires it’s own post, but for now I’m raising it as it’s been all to relevant lately.

So the optimism and blessings in all this upheaval? Well, I’ve been available to take care of my children, manage activities that my husband can’t do having had knee surgery, I haven’t had to let down a team or employer by not showing up, and essentially I’ve been the coordinator for the various people who are helping our home be safe and comfortable once again.  Just too bad, this isn’t regarded as a “job” with any monetary value.

Acting in a state of faith also means, doing the things that keep me moving forward in business and life, taking pragmatic steps to stay in the game and play at my best. So I got back to writing today and yesterday on facebook I professed, not being sure where the motivation would come from, but it arose by being honest with myself and the situation – I don’t necessarily like the “mess” but compelled to express my thoughts about life and share with those who find themselves in this unpredictable and forever changing landscape of life.

The simple act of buying a lotto ticket may or may not change my financial position but why not play the odds given the cards that have been dealt? Maybe, why I chose to ski down a run earlier this week in which I fell badly and hurt my knee – the risk obvious, the reward: I’m alive and doing things I enjoy. Life and business is a gamble, we take risks to reap the potential rewards and here again, another meaning in this mess!

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